Exercising Restraint

Exercising restraint. I'm trying to teach my children that lesson. It applies to so many areas of life: public outbursts, emotional outbursts, and those odd stomach feelings that lead to outbursts of the pants kind.

The lesson must be learned on when to give in to the feelings you have, and when not to. We can not easily control our feelings; yet. Music, alcohol and chocolate do work to degrees, but I recommend none in excess and gravely caution using all three in excess at the same time. Christmas comes but once a year you know.

We CAN control our response to those impulses. For example, I had the following exchange with a friend who I had just informed that a common acquaintance was great with child.

Him: "So-and-so is pregnant?"
Me: "Yup, She has a growth in her."
Him: "Isn't that like a tumor?"
Me: "Until it comes out and screams at you."

I exercised the restraint of NOT saying that with the common acquaintance, or anyone who has or could bear children, within earshot.

Knowing when, and where to give in makes all the difference. Succumbing to the temptation to graze from a co-worker's candy dish is bad; waiting for them to turn their back first is cunning.

Lately I have been trying to get into the discipline of running. This is exactly how it sounds: as painful and difficult as replacing that body wash sponge with steel wool. As a result almost any excuse is a good one.

So when my older daughter called me at the office two weeks ago I had the challenge of exercising my restraint of exercise avoidance impulse.

Her: "Daddy, I want you to get a ride home today."
Me: "Why is that honey, I was hoping to deplete myself of oxygen and dignity today."
Her: "My friend is over and she was hoping we could play 'Capture the flag'".

See I took a day off to help my 9 and 6 year old daughters, and two other 9 year old girls assemble foam swords of their own out of wooden doweling, pool noodles and duct tape. I'm out $10 each, we all have a fun recreation of hitting each other with reasonable impunity.

Now I have a kicking arsenal of safe and colourful re-enforced pool noodle assault weapons. Seeing a 6 year old girl standing at 4' tall wield a 6.5' long lime green sword is a thing of beauty to the eyes and a point of peril to the sensitive bits.

To avoid it being a simple but rousing game of "Daddy Piniata" I suggested "Capture the flag", where we divide into teams, hide a "flag", and then try to steal each others flag. If your flag is stolen you must beat that person until they drop it and then you can take it back.

So when I get a call at work asking me to rush home to play this game some more, I waived my restraint and a good time was had by all. Wisdom is knowing when to give in and when to duck.